[Start with Ricardo and Fingers running after Surge and Meathead, both angry.]
Ricardo: Stop! Thieves! You have stolen my precious Blotto tickets and ignited my firey banana rage! (Starts shooting his potato gun.)
[Cut to Surge and Meathead running, still carrying the tickets and yelping. Meathead grabs the tickets from the monkey head.]
Meathead: Time for us to banana split! Ricardo’s gone crazy!
Surge: I know, right? It’s p-p-positively sh-sh-shocking!
[Meathead and Surge hit the end of Ricardo’s mansion and skid to a stop.]
Surge: We’re trapped! But I’m not going down without a f-f-fight!
[Shoves the tickets in Meathead’s hands and grabs one of the rolls of toilet paper, flinging it at Ricardo and Fingers, who skid to a stop and dodge it as it crashes between them. Cut back to Surge and Meathead, who has some tickets stuffed in his mouth. Meathead is starting to climb the mansion.]
Surge: Whaddya know! This flat battery still has some juice!
Meathead: You sure do, Surge! (Laughs.) But I got all the Blotto tickets! (Laughs maniacally.)
Surge: N-n-never trust a fully-loaded sub! They always want e-e-everything on it!
[Surge starts to climb the building after Meathead, with Ricardo running in and following.]
Surge: Those t-tickets are mine!
Ricardo: Actually, the tickets are mine!
[Cut to the top of the mansion, where Meathead leaps to the roof, shaking it.]
Meathead: Finders keepers, losers weepers!
[Ricardo reaches the top of the mansion.]
Ricardo: Perhaps, but I assure you, I will not be the one weeping, my footlong friend!
[Surge starts to reach the top, as Ricardo starts to swipe at Meathead.]
Surge: Oh, yeah? W-w-we’ll see about that!
Surge and Ricardo: Give me those tickets!
[The two of them lunge at Meathead, toppling all three of them off of the tower, scattering the tickets in the air. All three of them fall, screaming, as Ricardo’s wig falls off. All three land on the counter as toilet paper rolls hit them and they react in pain, while Fingers walks off.]
Meathead: My head!
[The tickets start flying near them as Ricardo jumps up.]
Ricardo: I am coming for you, my precious!
[Ricardo jumps on a toilet paper roll and rolls away on it. Meathead and Surge leap up and start chasing after him.]
Meathead: Oh, no, you don’t!
[Cut to the ticket scanner. The tickets land under it, flashing red dollar signs, which continue to multiply. Ricardo rolls in, jumping off of the toilet paper roll.]
Ricardo: They’re all winners and all mine!
Meathead: (Offscreen.) HOLD ON!
[Meathead and Surge rush in, pushing Ricardo. All three react in pain. The tickets fly out of the scanner and into the air. Cut to Meathead, Surge, and Ricardo gulping in fear and shock. Cut to the ventilator fan, which the tickets fly into, shredding.]
Meathead, Surge, and Ricardo: (Offscreen.) NOOO!
[Cut to outside the Yucky Mart, where the ticket shreds fly out of the vent. Cut to Meathead, Surge, and Ricardo walking sadly towards Ricardo’s mansion, which now has graffiti on the wall and a broken call button. Stinky is standing halfway in the gate, tapping his foot and looking disapprovingly at the three. Ricardo reaches the gate and Stinky jumps in, slamming it and breaking off one of the R decorations on the door.]
Ricardo: Stinky?! How dare you slam my own gates in my own handsome banana face!
Stinky: Ain’t yours anymore, bub! You’re flat busted! But I used that chocolate coin you gave me to scratch and win a Blotto ticket that fell right out of the sky! Now all you deadbeats are working for me!
[Cut to the Yucky Mart bathroom. Fingers is holding onto a rope that is dunked into the toilet. Stinky is on the other side, wearing a monocle, black shoes, a top hat, and holding a cane. Fingers pulls up on the rope, hoisting up Surge, Ricardo, and Meathead, who are all tied by their feet. The tops of their heads are stained.]
Stinky: Come on, ya lazy slowpokes! I hired you to bob for toilet pennies, and that’s what you’re gonna do!
Ricardo: (To the camera.) Eh, it’s a living.
[Fingers lets go of the rope, dropping the three down and splattering toilet water, which covers the screen.]