[Start with Egghead sitting on the coffee machine, writing a letter.]

Egghead: (Still with Received Pronunciation accent) Dearest Health Department, I’ve become aware of a disturbingly large number of health code violations at this grocery establishment. These include, but are not limited to…

[Cut to an air vent spewing fumes.]

Egghead: (Narrating.) A faulty air conditioning unit…

[Cut to Doc Broc walking through the fumes, which split his florets into three parts. Cut back to Egghead writing.]

Egghead: A cockroach using the hot buffet as their playground…

[Cut to the hot buffet, where a swarm of cockroaches are swimming in the bowls of spoiled food and cheering. Pan to a group of cockroaches using an empty hot buffet bowl as a gravesite, crying.]

Egghead: (Narrating.) And as a graveyard.

[Cut back to Egghead, still writing, and then cut to a dripping air vent.]

Egghead: And, a mysterious toxic leak, mutating unidentified life.

[The slime drips onto a pile of queso dip, mutating it.]

Unknown Queso Grossery: I’m alive! Dance party! (Dances around, muttering, and then runs off.)

[Cut back to Egghead, still writing.]

Egghead: I trust you will act swiftly to shut this store down for good. Observantly yours, Egghead E. Eggerton, Esquire. (Stops writing and puts letter in an envelope.) There. Now, to drop this message in the mail and wait for this ghastly place to be condemned.

[Egghead walks off. Cut to Pizza Face and Rocky pouring a slide from a container of salsa.]

Pizza Face: Egghead! We were looking for you!

Rocky: Come and help us out!

Egghead: Great gastric gases! What are you doing?

Pizza Face: We noticed jar crack stinking and leaking. So, naturally we decided to play with it.

Rocky: Awesomest water slide ever!

Egghead: (Angrily) That’s not water, it’s spoiled salsa!

Pizza Face: Huh? Well, it explains the smell! And the corn.

Rocky: (Cheering.) Salsa slide!

Egghead: (Holding his nose.) Excuse me, I have somewhere else to be. Anywhere else, in fact. (Walks off.)

Rocky: Suit yourself!

Pizza Face: Ready, Rocky?

Rocky: Born ready! (Cheers and jumps off the counter.) Tunabunga!

[Cut to Egghead leaping off the counter and landing on the floor, looking up and then walking off to a mailbox.]

Egghead: Oh, my. Thankfully, once I mail this letter to the health department, this whole place will be shut down! In you go!

[Cut back to Pizza Face, Rocky is walking up to him.]

Pizza Face: Did he say what I think he said?

[Pizza Face and Rocky jump onto the slide.]

Pizza Face and Rocky: Get ‘em!

[Cut back to Egghead, the letter still in his hands.]

Egghead: Oh, dear!

[Egghead runs off screaming. Cut back to Pizza Face and Rocky racing down the slide, looking angry.]

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